Corona Storms Ohio
Not the good kind, either.
Millennial hieroglyphics, aka Memes, were engineered to make us laugh for 10 seconds as the world burned around us. Sometimes however they make you realize electoral politics is a fool’s errand:
Anyway, happy Tuesday! Please pay me money:
THAT FAMOUS VIRUS WE LOVE TO KNOW ARRIVES IN THE STATE WE ALSO LOVE TO KNOW
Well well well. The Ohio government spent the last two weeks reminding people there were no confirmed coronavirus cases. However once we started actually testing people (Saturday, for those scoring at home) we immediately confirmed the mutated bat virus from Wuhan, China has arrived in Ohio.
From wwjnewsradio.com:
(WWJ/AP) Ohio has announced its first confirmed cases of new coronavirus, or COVID-19, the Associated Press reports.
Three people have tested positive in Cuyahoga County, which is in the northeastern part of the state.
According to information from state officials, five more people are being monitored for possible infection.
90% chance the three infected people play for the Cleveland Browns. Knowing our franchise it will be our coach, general manager and owner. And all I’m saying is if coronavirus kills Jimmy Haslam that I will write a thank-you letter to President Xi of China for his mandate for his righteous judgment in crafting virus in a lab and unleash it on America.
JOKES ASIDE, OUR GOVERNMENT IS IN NO WAY PREPARED TO DEAL WITH AN EPIDEMIC
Ohio Republicans have spent the last decade gutting local funding. One area that affects is local healthcare via an underfunded Department of Health. When I ran for Statehouse, I heard stories of voters having to travel for over an our for basic medical care that would be provided locally in a country not governed by lizard pedophiles. I knew single-payer healthcare in Ohio might be a pipe dream at the moment, but we could at least start with fully funding health departments.
Well, nobody wanted to hear that opinion and the chickens have come home to roost with the coronavirus.
From washingtonpost.com:
When an outbreak hits, public health departments are America’s front line of defense. Since the coronavirus reached U.S. soil, thousands of local health officials across the country have been working nonstop and scrambling to prepare.
But in the unfolding war against the coronavirus, they are already hamstrung — decades of budget cuts have left many local departments without the staff, equipment or plans to mount an adequate response. Local health departments say they’re already pulling employees from critical efforts such as opioid abuse prevention. A sudden burst of new cases could force them to choose where to divert resources and possibly endanger the public, experts said.
In San Bernardino County, Calif., the staff is spread so thin that three paid interns from the health department have been handling most of the coronavirus groundwork, according to assistant health officer Erin Gustafson. Their main responsibility is to monitor about 390 recent travelers returning from China and other countries severely affected by the outbreak who have been asked to self-quarantine.
Please don’t listen to these Business-pilled freaks that are trying to convince you to keep your savings invested with the cocaine wolves of Wall Street. At the very least you can eat your losses, sell now, and then buy back into the party when COVID-19 fully grips the American economy.
THERE IS AN ALARMING NUMBER OF PEDOPHILES IN OHIO
One thing you realize when you regularly smoke weed is how incompetent cops are at their jobs. These dipshits spend billions of years ago and weed is available carte blanche in every corner of America.
Maybe they should take some of the money they spend investigating people with plants in their pocket and direct it towards the cyber criminal pedophiles infesting our state.
From Josh Sweigart of daytondailynews.com:
Reports of online child pornography to Ohio law enforcement agencies have increased dramatically in recent years, raising concerns that there aren’t enough resources to combat the problem, a Dayton Daily News investigation found.
Efforts to stem this tide have led to arrests of prominent local men including Greg Ramey, former child psychologist at Dayton Children’s Hospital, and former Oakwood police chief Alex Bebris.
Other local men charged in the past year include four arrested more than once. One has been convicted three times. A Warren County man went to prison in November for possession of “probably the most horrifying child pornography that we’ve ever seen,” the county prosecutor said.
These freaks walk among us. And the sad thing is most of them are gainfully employed and trusted community figures who interact with children every day.
IT’S STILL LEGAL TO DISCRIMINATE AGAINST LGBTQ IN OHIO
Ohio is one of 30 states in America in which it’s legal to fire someone for the high crime of homosexuality or other non-Christian-sanctioned sexual activities.
Will that change this year? Maybe. But probably not.
From Becca King of lgbtqnation.com:
Ohio has yet to pass statewide anti-discrimination protections on the basis of sexual orientation and gender identity, leaving the majority of Ohio cities without protection in employment, housing, and public accommodations.
The Ohio Fairness Act, as proposed in companion bills Senate Bill 11 and House Bill 369, would amend Ohio’s Civil Rights Law to prohibit discrimination in these categories and to grant the Ohio Civil Rights Commission the power to mediate such cases informally.
“It is a fair proposal that will simply give people who are lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender the same freedom to work, the same freedom to live where they choose, and the same full equal participation in society, just as anyone else in Ohio,” testified Ohio Sen. Nickie Antonio (D), the primary sponsor of Senate Bill 11. “It has been over 50 years since we have updated the Civil Rights Act. And for the estimated 400,000 LGBT Ohioans, fairness is long overdue.”
The sad thing is knowing this simple piece of legislative justice will be stonewalled by Republican lizards who are only beholden to voters who think men and women don’t have the same amount of ribs. I wish I were wrong.
CORONA MAY KILL THE CRUISE
Northwest Ohio Couples Quarantined Aboard Cruise Ship
I have a friend in my life who is probably one of the top-10 proponents of Cruises in the world. I was skeptical but he had me convinced right until President Xi cured humanity with the coronavirus.
I saw that friend the other night and after a couple of beers he swore he was going on a cruise next month. I talked to him just now and he said he’s going to delay it until next year when China suddenly develops a vaccine.
Stories like this are why:
TOLEDO Northwest Ohio has several people on board the Princess Cruise Ship.
That ship has been waiting off the shore of California waiting for permission to dock.48 people on board were tested for Coronavirus and 21 tested positive.
As a result, 2,500 passengers have been confined to their rooms.
I’m not saying being marooned on a cruise is Hell. I’m asking what the difference would be?
THOSE WMDs. 43 embarrassing grammar mistakes even smart people make… The truth of what a toothbrush represents in modern dating… The four desires driving all human emotion… The benefits of intermittent fasting… What happens to all those beads after Mardi gras?