In Ohio politics, the bullies usually win
"We can't trust the children's hospitals," said State Rep. Gary Click (R-Vickery).
I was arguing with State Rep. Joshua Williams (R-Sylvania), the rape joke enthusiast, last month at the Statehouse if you can believe that.
I don’t remember what started it. But I remember what ended it.
“Well,” Williams said. “Unlike you, I respect what goes on in this place!”
It was one of those occasions when I could do nothing but laugh in response.
But Williams was right. I don’t respect the charade that passes as a state government at One Capitol Square. And I’m glad I finally put down the vodka and went to investigate myself because our state government is akin to a high school where your most wretched, stupid classmates stuck around for 20 years while deluding themselves into thinking they’re worthy of respect.
The Ohio House Majority Caucus would probably pay for a one-way ticket for me to anywhere in the world as long as I promised to stay there. They don’t respect me, and I don’t respect them.
If I saw their eyes light up with glee when I walked into a room—or worse, shrug with indifference—then I’d probably have to reexamine the life choices that led to that gutwrenching moment.
Wednesday’s House vote to override Governor DeWine’s veto of the disgusting HB-68 legislation is a perfect example of why I feel the way I do.
The 135th General Assembly has been the least productive legislative assembly since the Eisenhower Administration, according to Jake Zuckerman of cleveland.com. There are numerous reasons why that is, but frankly, it’s music to my ears. The less the Republican supermajorities are working, the better for anyone who isn’t a cisgender white person making more than $250,000 a year.
But these losers—many of whom facing primaries in March from even bigger kooks and bigots—ended their winter vacation a week early to override a veto that would strip transgender children and teenagers of much-needed healthcare in a move that will inevitably lead to a spike in teen suicide in a state already soaked with guns.
HB-68 will also boot the six transgender teenagers currently playing—and not dominating by any means—high school athletics in the state.
It’s just another reminder that the jocks were the protagonists in Revenge of the Nerds series. The Ohio Legislature shows us what happens in real life when we let those socially stunted lepers out of the lockers we stuffed them in.
Through the anti-transgender bigotry that has been pushed through the State Legislature twice now, I have come to have more respect from the actual bigots than I do the so-called moderates who know better but still vote against their conscience in fear of losing a primary.
At least the bigots are upfront about wanting to drown your friends in a river.
Take State Rep. Brett Hillyer (R-Uhrichsville), for example. He’s quiet and thoughtful, which is more than you can say about most of his colleagues. Previously, he abstained on HB-68—which is about as good as it gets for Republican courage.
On Wednesday, he told a transgender rights activist that he was “still undecided” as he walked into the House chamber for the fateful vote.
Let’s look at how Hillyer felt after he voted in favor of big government stepping on the necks of transgender children and teenagers:
Hillyer knows better! And while I would take Hillyer any day of the week over whatever hobgoblin is running against him, it will be hard to sympathize with him if he loses.
State Rep. Jamie “The Gigachad” Callender (R-Concord Twp.) also disappointed me. Callender has voted against anti-transgender nonsense, but he abstained in the original HB-86 vote.
On Wednesday, he was on a pre-booked flight to Mexico, where he owns a condo.
While he issued a statement against the override to WEWS’ Morgan Trau, he didn't have the heart to come to Columbus and put that vote into stone. But compared to his other compatriots, he was as brave as the troops who stormed Normandy.
State Rep. Haraz Ghanbari (R-Perrysburg) was another Republican who earned my respect and was somebody I thought knew better. Unfortunately, he’s facing a primary challenge from a weird, insecure British lady.
After a bout with COVID caused him to miss the original HB-86 vote, Ghanbari made a sickening speech on the floor ahead of the override vote to shore up his right flank.
Like Hillyer, it will be hard to feel sympathy when the HB-86 override does nothing to quell the fervor against him from the worst elements of his party.
After the vote, I randomly ran into my old friend, State Rep. Jena Powell (R-“Arcanum”), in the Statehouse rotunda. I shouted thanks to God for blessing me with the opportunity. Powell, who has never acknowledged me on camera, immediately turned around, flustered, and told me that I “couldn’t harass her.”
Asking questions isn’t harassment. But it was ironic that she can’t deal with some unkempt blogger asking her about her latest dishonesty with voters, but she has no problem stripping healthcare from children and teenagers as a way to score political points with Evangelical cretins.
Incidentally, though, Powell led me right into a press conference featuring some of the most repulsive lizard people in the Ohio House.
The “Oh jeez” from State Rep. Beth Lear when she sees me coming, and the ensuing shoulder-check to keep me from pursuing Powell, is the kind of stuff that sustains me—other than the generosity of the brave and noble person reading this dispatch, of course.
But I am glad Powell led me into the press conference of true believers. I’m glad I got that picture, too, because I wanted to preserve the types of people who not only voted to strip healthcare from children and teenagers but also held a celebratory press conference afterward.
From left to right:
Riordan McClain (Upper Sandusky): Home-schooled nepotism baby.
Darrell Kick (Loudonville): Farmer and real estate “investor.”
Melanie Miller (Ashland): Executive director of a fake pregnancy crisis center.
Jena Powell: Home-schooled billboard saleswoman.
Joshua Williams (Sylvania): Substandard criminal defense attorney.
“Mean Jean” Schmidt (Loveland): Career politician, athlete.
Gary Click (Vickery): Baptist minister who practices conversion therapy.
Derek Merrin (Monclova): Nepotism baby, real estate investor.
Dick Stein (Norwalk): Photographer.
Corinna Cohn: A shill who underwent gender-affirming care as an adult before transitioning at 19. She now makes a living flying around the country to make bigoted statements against gays and transgender people. She was shamelessly used as a prop for the occasion by Rep. Click.
Jennifer Gross (West Chester): Anti-vaccine family nurse practitioner.
Marilyn John (Shelby): Former senior center executive and insurance underwriter.
Beath Lear (Galena): Insane religious kook.
Tracy Richardson (Marysville): Former troop and human resources officer.
Angela King (Celina): Realtor.
Not that it will do anything for the people hurt most by this legislation at the moment, but this press conference will age as well as former State Rep. Jim Jordan trying to ban gay marriage in Ohio as recently as 23 years ago.
But that won’t be good enough for the legislators in the press conference. They will continue to attack transgender people because they don’t believe transgender people have a right to exist. That it’s a potent political issue for them is just an added bonus.
It’s yet another example of why we need to pass legislative redistricting reform later this year. Organizers are working around the clock to get that on the ballot; this time in a way that will remove corrupt politicians like domestic terrorist State President Matt Huffman (R-Lima) from the process entirely.
Wednesday was yet another example that the inmates are running the asylum, and the Republican Supermajority is unfit to wield the power it only won through corrupt ratfuckery.
THOSE WMDs. Corrected link: Why Iowa went red as surrounding states went blue… ESPN used fake names to secure Emmys for ‘College GameDay’ stars… How a Koch-linked group stalled a bipartisan Ohio energy efficiency bill at the last moment… Our favorite scented candles… Jon Bair killed a Neo-Nazi 28 years ago, and he has a message for Portland.
Gary Click is a closet trans porn enthusiast, I’ve never been more certain of anything in my life.
Hi DJ great work as usual. Wasn't sure where to post this, but curious of your perspective on the Substack content moderation approach. You know that Communists and Nazis don't get along, right? Will you continue on the platform, move, or do a wait and see?