Quarantine Day 7: American Death Rattle
Quarantine Day 7: American Death Rattle
All it took was a preventable global plague to demolish the facade of small-government American exceptionalism.
Whoever cursed me to living in interesting times was a piece of shit.
Every day feels like a decade now. Yesterday I was mad I wasn’t drinking $3 bottles of rum on a beach in a Caribbean Communist country where it’s illegal to be a conservative.
Today the State Department is warning Americans against international travel and I’m mad I’m not riding high-speed rail to the nation’s capital with a backpack of molotov cocktail assembly kits and a crowbar.
I can’t do that because I was born in America, the only industrialized country in the world that doesn’t believe in mass transit because the last thing our corrupt ruling class wants is the unwashed assembling in the nation’s capital within three hours like in France.
Three weeks ago, the president’s least famous failson, who is supposed to be firewalled from his father as he oversees the family business while Daddy Deals ruins the country, offered an investment opportunity to his 3.2 million followers in a tweet that has since been deleted for reasons I can’t imagine:
Millions of gullible idiots see this criminal family as astute businesspeople, so it’s not wild to think that a few hundred thousand Americans at the very least took this sage financial advice.
President Business continued to downplay the threat of coronavirus, even going as far to initially laud the “Chinese Communist Party” for their response to threat.
Keep in mind that Trump, whose taxes we still have yet to see, can manipulate the stock market with a single tweet.
The sole goal of his presidency is to funnel taxpayer money into his personal coffers. The criminal-in-chief has funneled at least $119 million to his properties while playing golf — and that’s just what we know about!
The Trump Non-Administration has seen its precious stock market crash in the last week. Suddenly these goons are asking states not to release unemployment numbers.
I wonder why that is? Hmm…
Goldman Sachs’ bottom line depends on fluffing Americans’ rosy views of the cocaine fiesta known as the stock market. Their estimates don’t include all the marginalized workers who won’t be able to file for unemployment. It doesn’t include the people who were already unemployed. That is to say this number does not represent the true economic impact to come.
Barring Jesus of Nazareth descending from the clouds, this time next week we will be in a financial crisis unseen since the Great Depression. And at least during the Great Depression you could go to work and not have to worry about being asymptomatic and spreading a deadly respiratory virus to vulnerable coworkers.
You might don’t feel well if you’ve made it this far. You’re probably sick to your stomach and worrying for not only yourself, but also your countrymen.
Empathy is one of the highest marks of intelligence. Unfortunately it also means you will probably never be a United States Senator.
Yesterday, NPR released secret audio of Senator Richard Burr (R-North Carolina) warning wealthy donors three weeks ago at a lavish luncheon in Washington D.C. that coronavirus would be the worst pandemic we’ve faced since the Spanish Flu, which is the racist name we gave to a virus that originated in Kansas.
Burr would later make multiple public statements about how we had nothing to worry about and everything was under control.
Somehow his day got worse from there!
ProPublica combed through his financial disclosure statements to see if he used confidential knowledge to more nefarious ends. And what do you know????
This motherfucker, who was one of three votes against the 2012 STOCK Act that banned Congress from trading on knowledge they gleaned from their ostensible day jobs, pulled $1.7 million to safety.
Not satisfied with avoiding economic collapse, he reinvested some of it in video conferencing software that coincidentally would expand in popularity during times of social distancing. Here is how his spokesperson responded when confronted with her boss’ blatant fuckery:
These are dark times for America when I’m agreeing with a cryptofascist racist piece of garbage like Tucker Carlson. I don’t think Tucker realized there would inevitably be other Senators who engaged in a similar pattern of corruption.
Kelly Loeffler (R-GA) recently purchased an appointment to her Senate seat. She took the oath of office on January 6th.
It took her less than a month to recoup her expenditures:
Her husband, Jeffrey Sprecher, ***is the chairman of the New York Stock Exchange***
Let that web of potential corruption unravel in your mind for a second. Now tell me why any working American would ever park their money in that den of jackals ever again?
Their net worth is half a billion dollars. I’m supposed to believe Loeffler didn’t talk with her husband about why she was unloading up to $3 million of their stock beforehand? I’m supposed to believe, “Gee, honey, why are you doing this?” wasn’t his next question?
Again, staving off disaster wasn’t enough for these parasites. She then took her money and invested in video conference software because that’s what you do as a psychopath.
Here’s Loeffler — two weeks after dumping stocks she knew would soon be worthless — lying to her constituents about America’s preparedness for the coming storm:
Good example of why I don’t trust white women over the age of 12 with hair below their shoulders. It’s spooky — and that’s before they’re lying to my face to curry favor with our incompetent sex criminal president.
Senators like David Perdue (R-GA), Ron Johnson (R-WI), and Jim Inhoffe (R-OK) will also need the services of white collar criminal defense attorney in the near future. If this ends with the abolishment of the Senate, so be it. We will emerge as a better country.
The most galling thing is these ghouls sold their constituents down the river and filed the proceeds on public financial disclosure documents!
I was offended by how stupid they think we are until I realized they only got caught because Senator Burr didn’t realize there was somebody with a soul in the luncheon audience when he spoke the truth to wealthy donors after weeks of lying to the public.
America is a failed state. You might not believe that yet. But you will.
For all our moral posturing, we’re still the world superpower willfully committing genocide on Iran due to that one time the war criminal George W. Bush labeled them as part of “the Axis of Evil.”
The Death Cult of President Business Deals is attempting to racially scapegoat China. And to be sure, President Xi fucked up when he tried to suppress initial findings about COVID-19.
What the cultists fail to realize, however, is their election of Trump has ensured China will supplant the U.S. as the world’s super power.
We didn’t learn anything from China’s mistakes. Our president, a certified numpty, also attempted to lie about an impending crisis. We could have been leading the world in our response. We would already be aiding other countries in their times of crisis.
Our bungled response spoiled all that. The world will remember China for their help, and rightfully so.
SO, UH… WHAT’S UP WITH OHIO? THIS IS STILL AN OHIO-BASED BLOG, RIGHT?
Other than our Secretary of State being hilariously incompetent? Well, we’re still carrying the torch for America’s response to CORVID—19:
That tweet, overall, is right. But the only reason we don’t have an official corona death is because the autopsy hasn’t come back.
I’m sure Mark Wagoner was a nice man to the people who knew him. I’m sure he did good things in life and all his friends remember him as a good person.
I don’t care. I can’t summon empathy for a man whose life work shredded the social safety net, gerrymandered our state and elected anti-intellectual morons throughout all levels of government, weaponized the fears of low-information voters at the ballot box, blocked single-payer healthcare and generally kept the boot the capital class on the neck of the poor.
Wagoner also voted for the diseased game show host for president in a state that was crucial to his upset victory.
Then this motherfucker has the gall to croak when coronavirus deaths are still a novelty? Before he gazes upon the late-capitalism hellscape that his bankrupt ideology wrought?
Nah, fuck Wagoner. Yeah, I said it. I concede that might not be the unifying nation this country probably wants to hear. Not my problem, though; I’m not running for office.
Oh well. He’s dead and once again my generation is holding the bag. What else is new?
THOSE WMDs. Dear politicians, stop calling people”taxpayers”… Forced to close due to coronavirus, The Book Loft now delivers… Coronavirus leading to shortage in methamphetamine and fentanyl… The billionaires will not save us… GameStop: We can stay open during lock down because we’re “essential retail.”