Rooster: 10 Years Since Big Bird Beat Ohio State
Rooster: 10 Years Since Big Bird Beat Ohio State
Ohio's efforts to save the Lordstown Chevy Cruze plant, Cuyahoga River fish safe to eat, and more.
This Wednesday is as good as any to commandeer your workplace and stuff your boss in a trashcan. If you’re alarmed and saying, “Wait, I’m the boss!” please present your subscription to the workers that will soon storm your office. You have been pardoned!
THE LAST MARCH MADNESS GAME I EVER WATCHED
America brainwashed me into caring about “March Madness,” an annual basketball tournament featuring future accountants with a smattering of future NBA players.
I outgrew the pox on my mind until yesterday, when I got reminded of the last NCAA Tournament I watched.
From Michael Kelly of dailygazette.com:
LOUDONVILLE — Ten years ago, the Siena College men’s basketball program scored perhaps the most memorable win in its history.
That was on March 20, 2009, when the ninth-seeded Saints downed eighth-seeded Ohio State 74-72 in double-overtime in the first round of the NCAA tournament at University of Dayton Arena.
Siena’s Ronald Moore forced the second overtime with a 3-pointer with 3.5 seconds to go in the first extra session, then Moore’s game-winning 3 — “Onions! Double Order!” — came with 3.9 seconds left in the second overtime. Moore’s clutch 3s were shot from near-identical spots on the floor.
After topping Ohio State, Siena lost 79-72 to No. 1 Louisville.
I don’t remember Ronald Moore. I do remember “Rossiter,” the ostrich-looking fellow who dropped 16 points and 15 rebounds on the Buckeyes.
I quit college basketball shortly thereafter, save for the years Eleven Warriors paid me to watch the corpse of the Thad Matta Era.
That said, I want to fight anyone who asks me to join their March Madness pool, but keep it legal out here folks.
Yost’s warning would carry more weight if Ohio state police had ever raided a white-collar office and arrested a March Madness pool operator. Claim your administrative fees, y’all!
OHIO TRIED TO SAVE THE LORDSTOWN PLANT
General Motors closed the Chevy Cruze plant in Lordstown earlier this month. Politicians of every stripe tried their best to save the regional lifeline.
From Jessie Balmert and Jackie Borchardt of Cincinnati.com:
Portman said he had talked with GM over the past several months and emphasized the company would save money under the new tax law by keeping operations in Lordstown instead of moving them to Mexico.
He said the company was “unwilling” to be specific with him about what’s next, but he hopes it will involve putting an electric car in the plant.
“Ohio and the federal government working together might be able to provide some incentives for a reinvestment in Lordstown again,” Portman said.
Both Brown and Portman say GM never brought up tariffs on steel and aluminum, imposed by Trump, in their discussions about the Lordstown plant.
On Wednesday, Brown spoke with Trump and sent him a copy of his bill to incentivize American auto sales with by offering a $3,500 discount on nearly 100 cars and trucks and fully taxing auto companies’ overseas profits.
Brown said Trump “said the right things” Wednesday night but needs to follow it up with action.
Ah, that’s the Rob Portman I know: Pretending to care about working people while lying about the GOP tax scam incentivizing companies like General Motors to outsource jobs. At least he can claim he held an ineffectual dialogue with GM. Not that any other politician fared better.
And as I’ve typed before: General Motors should never sell another car in Ohio again. The way they accepted government bailout money before stabbing workers in the back should never be forgotten or forgiven.
HOLY HELL, PARENTS STILL SMOKE WITH CHILDREN IN THE CAR?
I’m old enough to remember when restaurants in Ohio had smoking sections. That era feels like it was three decades ago, yet apparently parents are still smoking cancer sticks while transporting their children???
From Kaitlin Schroeder of daytondailynews.com:
Ohio lawmakers are considering a law banning drivers from smoking if there’s a passenger in the car under the age of six.
Senate Bill 78, sponsored by state Sen. Tina Maharath, D-Canal Winchester, proposes a $500 fine for violators of the law, and for subsequent violations be fined $500 plus $250 for each additional violation.
The bill has been referred to the Senate Judiciary Committee.
Similar bills have been considered in the last session and the session before that. The law has been promoted as a way to protect children from the health consequences of second hand smoke, which can lead to asthma, ear infections and other health problems.
The only quibble I have with this bill is parents who smoke cigarettes around their children should be in jail. Instead, our great state imprisons low-level marijuana dealers. What’s the bigger crime? It’s easy math to me.
FISH FROM THE CUYAHOGA RIVER SAFE TO EAT (I’LL TAKE THE GOVERNMENT’S WORD)
As the haters love to remind us, Cleveland has a river that once caught on fire. But alas! A fifty-year cleanse is all local fish needed to become edible once again.
From Julie Carr Smyth of apnews.org:
COLUMBUS, Ohio (AP) — Fish in the Cuyahoga River, which became synonymous with pollution when it caught fire in Cleveland in 1969, are now safe to eat, federal environmental regulators say.
The easing of fish consumption restrictions on the Cuyahoga was lauded Monday by Republican Gov. Mike DeWine as an important step toward ultimately delisting the river altogether as an area of concern. Seven impairments remain to be addressed before that can happen.
“This is an example of the progress that can be achieved when you collaborate and dedicate resources to improving the quality of water in our state,” DeWine said in a statement. “We need to continue to invest in our water resources so that we can see additional improvements.”
The announcement came as DeWine is pushing a state budget that includes nearly $1 billion for water quality projects aimed at cleaning up toxic algae in Lake Erie and protecting other lakes and rivers in the state.
I’d rather eat trash than fish. And I’d rather eat asphalt than roll the dice on a mutant plucked from the Cuyahoga River. I’m sure the EPA has worked wonders; I still can’t bring myself to feast on a fish carcass.
WONDER BREAD LOAVES TO PERFORM AT THE STATE FAIR
Everybody knows I have terrible taste in music (I’ve been listening to the same 25 songs since 2009, baby!) but holy shit, look what the Ohio State Fair plans to unleash upon its patrons.
From wdtn.com:
KIDZ BOP World Tour 2019
Chris Young
Lyfe Jennings / Chanté Moore / Carl Thomas
Hank Williams Jr.
Gabriel Iglesias: Beyond The Fluffy World Tour
Toby Keith with special guest Jimmie Allen
John Denver Tribute featuring Ted Vigil
Matthew West with special guest Matt Maher
REO Speedwagon with special guest Night Ranger
Bad Company with special guest Foghat
I’d rather risk my life on an unregulated carnie ride than listen to any of those noise makers. I didn’t even know Toby Keith was still living.
THOSE WMDs. The Electoral College is the biggest threat to our democracy… Anna Delvey and Elzabeth Holmes had the same tell: their hair… Song for my father… Bayer-Monsanto merger: Endangering our health, food, plants and planet… Facebook is spying on you, just not through your phone’s mic… Look at these absolutely normal Americans who hate Medicare for All.