Rooster in Review: We're Going to Youngstown (Read: Gerard) to Cover Ron DeSantis & J.D. Vance!!!!
Rooster in Review: We're Going to Youngstown (Read: Gerard) to Cover Ron DeSantis & J.D. Vance!!!!
Just three weeks ago that bike would have been made of Tito's Handmade Vodka. A used Trek 7300 is a much wiser and healthier investment thanks to President Xi Jinping's Patriots Caucus.
Ronald Reagan’s Patriots Caucus responded in a big way to the Bike Blowout Sale. As promised, the Jeni’s Ice Cream exposé has been unlocked, and a used 7300 Trek from Bingo Bikes has been purchased for $380. (Shoutout to subscriber Mark who stopped by!)
I knew I could raise that over 48 hours, but I did not expect the support of untraditional Constitutional Conservative media to be that swift. I should have known better than to doubt #MAGA nation.
A deal is a deal, however, and the sale will continue today. The Rooster needs a few more patriots to answer the call, too, because we’re headed to the Metroplex Expo Center in Girard, Ohio, tonight to cover Ohio Senate candidate J.D. Vance and Florida Governor Ron DeSantis’ joint rally.
Please do not doubt my sincerity to the conservative cause, as this means I will have driven more on this trip than I have in the last three months. But I will endure that nightmare to deliver the news to patriots like yourself that liberal media would never have the courage to report.
You might have read from the lamestream media that Turning Point USA, the patriotic group hosting this banger, has placed a bunch of restrictions on the press and somehow, this is a sign of a nascent fascist movement.
Cry more, libs. The Rooster was granted access with zero problems.
Please consider a subscription for the road to Girard. If all goes according to plan, maybe I can stay at a mob-run hotel in downtown Youngstown tonight and double our money by playing blackjack at an illegal casino.
This week in Ohio Man…
I cannot imagine being so much of a loser that you find a bag of hashish in your DoorDash order and not only call the cops but then do a bunch of media interviews about it.
From Joana Scopel of msn.com:
The man, who preferred not to give his name, said he found hashish at the bottom of the bag, along with a plastic fork. He said the delivery driver returned to his home shortly after saying he'd gotten the orders mixed up and that he was meant to be dropping off some medication for a friend.
"Did this start with the driver? Or did this start in the restaurant that I ordered this from?" asked the man who was obviously not pleased. "I even have a close friend whose nephew actually passed away due to smoking some marijuana that was laced by fentanyl."
Rather than returning the hash to the delivery man, he called the police and then filed a complaint with DoorDash.
The man is lying about his “close friend’s nephew” overdosing on marijuana laced with fentanyl. He might have overdosed on fentanyl, but it certainly wasn’t laced with marijuana unless he did that himself.
No weed dealer is trying to kill their customers; even if they were, it wasn’t the marijuana that killed him! Get this joker and his fake fentanyl panic out of my face.
This week in The Rooster:
The #businessmindset we all love to know brought another bountiful harvest for The Rooster.
Here are this week’s dispatches:
Three Days in the Workhouse. I spent a weekend in Franklin County Correctional Facility III once upon a time, and that’s how I know the new policy barring in-person visits is abhorrent.
Columbus Leaders Won’t Even Tweet in Support of Teachers. A majority of Columbus’ ostensibly pro-labor city council has yet to make a social media post about the impending teachers’ strike.
Crowcast Episode 7: Kelly MacKay. Marion City School Board president, and mother of The Rooster, Kelly MacKay, stops by Rooster HQ to talk about public education in the CRT-era, Ohio’s shambolic public school system, and more.
Euclid’s Reality Star, Polyamorist Councilman Resides in Florida. This week’s most popular
As always, be sure to follow The Rooster on Twitter for all of Ohio’s depravity, all the time.
THOSE WMDs. An old medicine remedies hair loss for pennies a day, doctors say… Inside the bizarre and dangerous Rod of Iron Ministries… The coming California megastorm… The door opened by Gangnam Style… How one man survived when he fell 70 feet into a glacier.