For those of you who, three weeks ago today, redeemed your free Rooster stickers, I am pleased to report that they were handed off to the patriots at the United States Postal Service yesterday afternoon before the 4 p.m. collection time.
I even took a picture for proof as stickers are off to places like Harpers Ferry, Baton Rouge, St. Paul and Seattleā¦ and, of course, all throughout the backwater outpost that is Ohio!
Youāre damn right that the top letter is addressed to āGrandview David Koresh.ā That piece of mail probably got me put on some sort of federal watchlist if I wasnāt already.
I would apologize for the delay in getting the 150+ stickers out the door, but as always, a Marionaire can never be late. We are always on time.
The Rooster will return on Monday, September 18th, at 4:33 a.m. with a look at what Ohio can learn from the communist utopia of North Dakota about banking. Iām biased, obviously, but should be a good one!
This week in Ohio Manā¦
Folks, I gotta say, whenever I type āOhio Manā into Google News to peruse stories for this weekās installmentā¦ Itās never filled with tales of heroic geniuses.
From 10tv.com:
TIFFIN, Ohio ā A man is hospitalized with severe injuries after a backyard explosion overnight in Tiffin.
Tiffin police and Tiffin Fire/Rescue responded to a report of an explosion in the backyard of a residence in the 100 block of Bobb Street just before 4 a.m. Saturday, according to a press release from the Tiffin Police Department. At the scene, offices found a 43-year-old man lying near a stack of wood in āwhat appeared to be a fire pit area.ā
Police believe the man attempted to use a gas can with high-octane racing fuel to start a recreational fire. An early investigation indicated the man had a lit cigarette in his mouth while attempting to pour fuel onto the stack of wood and an explosion occurred.
The nice thing about being a recovering alcoholic is that I can read a story like this, which wonāt make sense to many people about how this man thought that was a good idea, and instantly realize that those are the kinds of decisions you make after drinking half a case of Busch Light on a weekend night.
Glad those days are behind me!
This week in The Roosterā¦
What Larry Householder can expect at FCI Elkton. Johnny Bartolomeo, a Hellās Angels OG, sits down with The Rooster to discuss conditions at Householderās new home for the next 20 years. This dispatch is free for all.
The origin of The Rooster. The 20-year story of how this humble operation got its name.
The way it works. The case of 20-year police veteran Demetris Ortega drunkenly killing a woman with his car exposes some major problems in the Columbus mediasphere.
As always, be sure to follow The Rooster on Twitter and TikTok for all of Ohioās depravity, all the time.
THOSE WMDs. How illegal harvesting of giant trees in California shines a light on rural povertyā¦ Walking through the night in a changing Riyadhā¦ The rise of the social vampire, and how to handle one in your lifeā¦ How to enjoy your next flight (or not hate it)ā¦ The culture war over race engulfed one school district.