We Must Protect the Border

So we're sending the National Guard and Ohio Highway State Patrol to stand around and do what, exactly?

America elected a Democrat in the last presidential election which automatically meant The Border (you know which one) became a humanitarian crisis in need of a continuous 2,200-mile cement wall. We never handle it well for a country of immigrants.

Like most red-blooded Americans, my ancestors came here the right way: fleeing religious strife and taking a Transatlantic voyage to Ellis Island for like $13 and Americanizing the family name from O’Byrne to Byrnes. That’s how I think it still works in 2021 because I’ve never even tried to hire a Canadian to do my taxes.

Personally, I want any immigrant on my team, even if they did get bamboozled by America’s “land of the free and home of the brave” propaganda. I respect anyone, for whatever reason, who is willing to move to a new country and try to make a life in a country with a different culture and language.

That makes me a minority in America. Yes, Republicans don’t bother to hide their racism when it comes to talking about The Border. But German Village voters wouldn’t sound much different if you tried to settle a couple hundred non-English-speaking refugees in their little slice of 19th century heaven.

That the economy would collapse within hours if we booted every undocumented worker from the country doesn’t mean campaigning on that promise doesn’t make for an effective political ploy from people that get their news from billionaire-funded oulets.

Texas governor Greg Abbott is attempting to fend off a primary challenge from his right flank, so he is currently using National Guard troops as pawns for a political messaging exercise. He calls it, “The Southwest Border mission.”

Ohio governor Mike DeWine, also attempting to fend off the kook majority of his party, is willing to play the game.

Not only are we sending 185 troops to assist at The Border in a non-law enforcement capacity to join the 115 National Guard member we deployed there back in 2020—we are also sending “about a dozen” State Highway Patrol officers with them.

From Tyler Buchanan of ohiocapitaljournal.com:

The governor separately approved a request from Texas Gov. Greg Abbott to send about a dozen Ohio State Highway Patrol officials to help law enforcement there with border surveillance. They will not be making arrests during this two-week assignment set to begin this month. 

A spokesperson for the Ohio State Highway Patrol confirmed this mission to Texas will be paid for using state funds.

This is morbidly hilarious. What is the State Patrol going to do along the border? Sit in their cruises and clock cartel operatives for speeding? Ticket them for driving without a license?

The whole thing is a farce. We’re sending troops on an all-expenses-paid vacation to Texas so they can stand around and play their part in their governor’s political play in order to wow voters with tough talk about The Border in the next election cycle.

If two Democratic governors engaged in this, oh my god the Republicans would shriek like banshees. You wouldn’t be able to have a drink at a bar in Ohio without hearing some fellow patron ranting about some piece of right-wing hobgoblin misinformation he read on Facebook while blowing diarrhea out of his asshole at 5 a.m. in the morning.

A traditional Democrat might lament all this and say, “This is stuff out of a third-world country!” while ignoring we were usually the Invisible Hand in said country, sabotaging their elections and installing dictators then being shocked when their citizens wanted to come eat some pie off our table.

Try to remember that the next time some TV reporter is trying to convince you that migrants and refugees seeking a new life in America is a top-500 problem in your life.

THOSE WMDs. Cops are set up to be dangerously bad shots… Woman’s battle to prove she isn’t dead… How to make time slow down… Robbing the XBox Vault: Inside a $10 million gift card cheat… The long night of the soul.