When the feds are listening

Ohio looks like it does for a very specific set of reasons.

It wasn’t that long ago that Larry Householder, then-Speaker of the Ohio House, was the most powerful politician in the state.

Who could blame him for having a bit of an ego? After his first Speakership ended in a cloud of FBI investigation, he returned to Columbus a decade later and won the Speaker’s gavel in a bitterly contested Republican race over his chief political rival, then-State Rep. Ryan Smith.

Why wouldn’t he want to engage in the shame kind of shady campaign finance tactics that ended his first reign? He had learned from his mistakes!

His voters sent him back to Columubus after he got indicted on RICO charges. No wonder he had designs to change Ohio’s term limits to allow him to serve as Speaker for 18 years. That kind of loyalty is usually only found in death cults.

It’s not like he awoke one day and said, “Gee, I’m going to attempt the largest bribery scheme in state history!” It’s that he came to power in a political culture that was so corrupt it seemed like just another day at the office to him. And what better way to finance a new deck on your Florida vacation home than some light bribery?

He would have gotten away with it, too! If not for the FBI already investigating Neil Clark, the notoriously corrupt super-lobbyist who died by suicide while wearing a “Mike DeWine for Governor” shirt in a car parked next to a retention pond near his Florida vacation home.

Thanks to the ensuing investigation into Clark and the conviction of Householder, we now have a rare glimpse of how political leaders and lobbyists talk when they don’t know the FBI is also listening to the conversation.

From Jessie Balmert of cincinnati.com:

“Neil, one thing I’ve noticed and you’re going to love this. In the last 12 years, the biggest thing I’ve noticed is how everyone’s a pussy,” Householder told Clark during a January 2018 conversation about fundraising.

Well, Householder was right about that. Just not in the way he thought.

Most politicos in the Statehouse are inherent cowards unwilling to upset the status quo. They would much rather accept checks from special interest groups than do anything that resembles campaigning.

But unfortunately for Householder, it also meant that they weren’t willing to break Ohio’s notoriously lax campaign finance laws in a way that could put them in federal prison. That was a short-term advantage to Householder that he mistook for a long-term benefit because, again, he never thought he would get caught.

“We can fuck them over later," Householder said of donors supporting Smith's slate of candidates.

Again, this is a searing insight into how things work at the Ohio Statehouse. Well-financed special interest groups getting priority service—unless they back the wrong candidate for Speaker. In which case, fuck them.

But this is why labor unions backed Householder and current Speaker Jason Stephens (R-Kitts Hill). Their campaign donations have kept Ohio from becoming a Right-to-Work state like many other Republican-dominated states.

"You blew the caucus money, bitch," Householder said of Smith's spending.

This is a fantastic quote. Zero notes.

"The nursing home money for (then-gubernatorial candidate Mike) DeWine is a big number. Okay?" Clark told Householder. "Those groups are going to get their shit done first for DeWine because, you know, (then-Gov.) John Kasich hasn’t talked to these fucking people in eight years.”

Ignoring the odious nursing home lobby might be the coolest thing then-Governor John Kasich did other than enacting Medicaid expansion. Not enough to save him from Hell, but cool nonetheless.

But once again, Clark shows how the wheels get greased in legislation. Nursing homes will “get their shit done first” — well before any problems affecting everyday Ohioans.

Won’t somebody think of the tax cuts?

Ohio Republicans have catered to Big Business interests and whatever social issue that’s currently upsetting their lunatic Holy Roller faction for the last 30 years.

That makes it comical to see somebody like Pat Tiberi, a lifelong Republican who served in the Statehouse and Congress, begging his Republican colleagues to invest in K-12 funding and job training instead of cutting taxes for the 10,000th time.

From Jo Ingles of statenews.org:

Government and business leaders said keeping high school graduates in Ohio and training them for the jobs of the future is key to the state’s future economic success. And they are urging members of the Ohio Senate, who are considering the two-year state budget right now, to invest in K-12 funding, college and job training opportunities.

[…]

Ohio Business Roundtable Executive Director Pat Tiberi said tax cuts are attractive to businesses. But he said if it comes down to tax cuts versus money for education at all levels and job training, the latter makes the most difference to business development in the Buckeye State.

"If you are an employer and you have 186 job openings that require a four-year degree or an advanced degree, a tax cut is not going to help you fill that job. You are going to look to move that job somewhere else," Tiberi said.

And this is the paradox that Ohio Republicans will be fighting until President Xi Jinping leads a conquering army into our polluted backwater outpost. (President Xi, please! Our people yearn for your freedom.)

Educated people don’t want to live in a state where LGBT rights are up for debate. They don’t want to live in a state with crumbling infrastructure and tumbling public education scores. They don’t want to live in a state where a miscarriage could be perceived as a criminal act by anti-abortion zealots.

At least Texas and Florida don’t have winters!

But Tiberi’s pleas fell on deaf ears, at least as far as the Ohio Senate is concerned.

From Anna Staver of dispatch.com:

The budget bill, released Tuesday, includes a plan for universal vouchers, changes to the school funding formula, and Senate Bill 1, which would change oversight of K-12 education. Senate leaders also plan to incorporate Senate Bill 83 that would make sweeping changes to higher education.

The Senate's version also created a $1.5 billion income tax cut, a $1 billion one-time fund for local projects and an August sales tax holiday in 2024 on most tangible items that cost less than $500.

When I say State Senate President Matt Huffman (R-Lima) is a domestic terrorist, this is precisely what I mean.

Universal vouchers would only reward wealthy parents with children already in private schools and further rob public schools. Senate Bill 1 would strip the elected State School Board of most of its powers and put them with unelected bureaucrats in the governor’s office.

Senate Bill 83 would attempt to create safe spaces for conservatives and right-wing thought on college campuses. The Ohio State University Board of Trustees came out against it two weeks ago.

As for the tax cuts, well, those will be financed by pillaging some of the most scenic lands in Ohio for the already failed fracking experiment.

From Jake Zuckerman of cleveland.com:

COLUMBUS, Ohio – Fossil fuel companies formally asked the state to open thousands of acres beneath one state park and two wildlife reserves for oil and gas exploration, new filings posted Monday show.

While state law shields their identities from disclosure, public notices on the Ohio Department of Natural Resources website show the drillers’ interest in broad swaths of Salt Fork State Park, Zepernick Wildlife Area and Valley Run Wildlife Area, all in eastern Ohio.

These mark the industry’s first steps toward fracking state lands since a recent state law passed by Republicans essentially force-started a dormant system created in 2011 to allow for drilling under state parks.

The Ohio River Valley Institute found that counties that welcomed the fracking boom in the early 2010s — supposedly the economic savior of the region — saw a decline in jobs, population and income.

Another study by Economic Health Perspectives found that living near fracking wells doubled children's risk for leukemia. Air pollution from fracking also caused serious long-term health problems for residents.

And much like Householder, we’re rerunning the same play! To enrich companies that won’t even be publicly named to fund tax cuts that will only help the wealthiest businesses and citizens among us.

Why don’t college-educated people want to move to Ohio? It’s not a mystery. Our leaders know why, but saying the truth would go against the fiefdom they’ve built within our state. They are content to rule over the ashes of our once-great state rather than see an influx of Democrat-voting college graduates.

They know their power and wealth will insulate them from the brutality of their decisions.

The Bust-Up List (6/7)

The Bust Up List is reserved for the Ohio Legislature’s most egregious offenders. We’re getting back into the flow of things at the Statehouse this week (may God have mercy on our souls), so I’m keeping a light list when I venture to 1 Capitol Square later today:

• State Rep. Brian Stewart (R-Ashville). This little freak had the nerve to tweet about Ohio’s bountiful nature over the Memorial Day Weekend. Yet he’s silent on the expansion of fracking in our state parks. Curious, to say the least.

• State Rep. Ron Ferguson (R-Wintersville). I want to give him a chance to respond to Speaker Stephens stripping him of his committee assignments.

• State Rep. Adam Miller (D-Columbus). This man pulled residency hijinks, and he’s dodged multiple encounters like Keanu Reeves dodging bullets in The Matrix. It ends today!

As always, be sure to follow The Rooster on Twitter and TikTok for all of Ohio’s depravity, all the time.

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