May God have mercy on us all
May God have mercy on us all
"President Xi send bombers."
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Listen… My mind was politically poisoned beyond repair long before I started The Rooster. Yet I would like to think even I have limits to the world’s least sexy orgy, which is American politics.
I am proud to report that I didn’t watch a second of last night’s presidential debate, but from Twitter, I gleaned it was the equivalent of two grumpy old men squabbling over a microwaved hotdog in hospice care.
Here are some tweets that made me laugh; you might send a trend of wanting to feed Biden amphetamines and imploring China to put the American experiment out of its misery.
NBC reported in the immediate aftermath that top Democrats finally conceded, “It’s Joever” after months of circling the wagons and telling us not to believe our lying eyes about Sleepy Joe’s obvious decline.
CNN analysts openly talked about replacing him on the ticket, which would be unprecedented in modern history at this stage.
Is that good? I don’t think that’s good for an incumbent president running against a wildly unpopular challenger.
The worst thing about Biden is that he selected the only other politician who would be worse at the job as his Vice President. I’m unsure how Democrats could skip over Kamala Harris after what the Administration owes Black women for their turnout in 2020.
My fantasy pick would be Illinois Governor J.B. Pritzker and Michigan Governor Gretchen Whitmer in that order.
We need a class traitor like Prtizker, who himself has Big Boy Swagger like President Business Deals, to turn the clock back on the last 30 years of governmental giveaways to the rich. The convention is in Chicago, too, with Pritzker’s largesse already underwriting the costs.
Ultimately, Biden will go down a lot like President Lyndon Johnson. Did a lot of great stuff domestically and squandered it by not meeting the moment on clear moral choices in foreign policy—Johnson with Vietnam and Biden for the senseless slaughter in Palestine.
I’m no Biden stan, obviously. It still sucks that the rest of us are most likely tied to this decrepit vessel, for better or worse.
State Rep. Beth Lear is really concerned about bathrooms
The Ohio House decided to sprinkle some anti-transgender nonsense into the finale of a 12-hour mega session on Wednesday.
The good news is one source confidently said the so-called Bathroom Bill, which would ban transgender people from entering their proper bathrooms at lower and higher institutions of learning in Ohio, is dead on arrival in the Senate.
State Rep. Beth Lear (R-Gelena), a sponsor of the bill and perhaps the most far-right member of the Ohio House, has had her brain overrun by so many worms that she thinks this issue animates normal voters in a General Election.
As I’ve said before, the one saving grace about Senate President Matt Huffman winning the Speakership for the next eight years would be seeing him having to deal with the likes of Lear and the Kook Caucus, who will attempt to eat his face the first time he doesn’t give them every desire of their theocratic fantasies.
In the meantime, it’s another gift from the Far Right before Ohio will likely vote on Redistricting Reform in November. Gerrymandering is a breeding ground for unserious operators like Lear, who think they’re ordained by God and refuse to compromise.
House Republicans hire gremlin who couldn’t hack it under Congressman Jim Jordan
State Rep. Phil Plummer led the charge to strip Speaker Jason Stephens and his allies of the Ohio House Republican Alliance campaign fund. Once handed the keys to the threadbare account and office, Plummer immediately hired consultant gremlins aligned with Senate President Matt Huffman, who is, in my opinion, a domestic terrorist.
Ray Yonkura, one of the newly hired gremlins, is only taking the job because he couldn’t hack it in the big leagues, according to Ohio Republican Congressman Jim Jordan and the Freedom Caucus.
From Punchbowl News:
House Freedom Caucus Chair Bob Good (R-Va.) has pushed aside the executive director of the hardline group’s political apparatus, according to multiple sources familiar with the move.
Good has ousted Ray Yonkura from running the House Freedom Fund and House Freedom Action. Yonkura is a longtime ally of Rep. Jim Jordan (R-Ohio), a founding member of the House Freedom Caucus and its former chair.
[…]
Jordan also griped about the state of the group’s political apparatus. Jordan questioned how the HFC’s political arm would protect Rep. Scott Perry (R-Pa.), its former chair, with such a paltry fundraising operation.
As it stands, Huffman’s team will oversee the rest of his Senate presidency, at least 12 competitive House seats, and lead the charge against the Redistricting Reform Amendment.
Sounds like a bold plan, so I’m ecstatic to read that Yonkura, who will be in charge in the most critical prong of Huffman’s power play, sucks at fundraising.
To me—as only a blogger talking shit—tapping a failed Freedom Caucus henchman seems like a curious move considering that wing of the party is already in the bag for Huffman.
The November House election will ultimately be determined in suburban seats, and Huffman’s crew has had little luck with those types of voters in recent elections.
But oh well, not my problem!
Oh, so that’s what happened…
I was biking through Whitehall yesterday and came across an enormous, condemned apartment complex that was once called Colonial Village near Livingston Avenue.
I figured some sort of travesty must have happened for a big complex to be shuttered. Call it a hunch!
From Richard Solomon of 10tv.com:
COLUMBUS, Ohio — More than 800 people were found living in "substandard conditions" at an apartment complex on the east side of Columbus.
The Colonial Village Apartments, located off East Livingston Avenue, was declared a public nuisance in August 2021. The case is still going through environmental court because of outstanding violations with the previous ownership.
According to the city, building and zoning crews were conducting routine inspections at the property when they found people living inside apartments that were supposed to be vacant.
The City Attorney’s Office said that upon learning that the property manager had allegedly rented substandard housing units, they immediately notified the Columbus Division of Police to open a criminal investigation.
This was apparently a big deal when it happened. And it’s one of the stories I’m surprised I missed hearing about.
In times like these, I wish a mid-level bureaucrat could issue a sternly written decree, bulldoze the property, and replace it with dense public housing. It’s depressing that slum lords can drag the process out through the courts for years. Columbus is deeply lagging in housing stock already, and the city let the slum lords fester over Colonial Village into an unsafe and unsanitary condition for more than 800 people.
It’s the type of story that reminds you that nothing will inherently change about Columbus real estate in the foreseeable future. That’s good news for the property owners and bad news for everybody else!
Ohio MAGA patriot pisses on $500 of Walmart Deli Sandwiches
I’m not sure what it says about the presidential race, but I would have successfully predicted it was a Donald Trump fan and not a Joe Biden fan that was under suspicion for pissing in a case of deli meat at a Walmart near Youngstown.
From Michael Reiner of wkbn.com, via (@EyeOnOhio)
BOARDMAN, Ohio (WKBN) — Police are investigating after reports state a man urinated inside a case full of deli sandwiches Tuesday night in Boardman.
Police were called to the 1300 block of Doral Drive around 7:30 p.m.
Reports said a store manager was notified around 5:30 p.m. that an unidentified customer reportedly urinated into a deli cooler full of sandwiches that were displayed for sale. Store management confirmed to police that there was urine on both the sandwiches and the cooler.
Reports said the sandwiches were disposed of and the cooler was cleaned. Police said the man could not be found in the store by management at that time.
[…]
Reports said the suspect is a white male who stands at 6 feet tall and weighs 200 lb. Police reports said he has white hair and was wearing a red “Make America Great Again” hat. Reports said he was wearing transitional-style glasses, a peach-colored horizontal striped shirt, black shorts, and tan flip-flop sandals. Reports said he was wearing a lanyard around his neck with a plastic placard attached. Reports said that he had a bronze-colored metal cane.
It’s weird how local media outlets have an unwritten rule that they outright won’t name the business when the story involves something embarrassing, like an unruly customer urinating on $500 in deli meat.
It’s always like “the 1300 block of Doral Drive,” as if that’s how any normal person talks to their friends. The story happened in a Wal-Mart. I’m sure that doesn’t delight their marketing executives, but it’s still the fact of the case and paints a more vivid image for readers than a nondescript deli.
Anyway, good luck with searching the Youngstown area for a white, 200-pound Trump acolyte in the Youngstown Area. I’d rather look for a specific snowflake in a blizzard.
THOSE WMDs. Don’t make this simple mistake grilling pineapple… Chicago-style Italian Beef Sandwiches… Unschooling is the trend pissing professionals off… What alarms doctors about the latest COVID surge… The confession of Martin Hitchens, the hacker who saved everything… 25 South Korean movies to watch.