Rooster Review: City of Kings dreamin'

The say a marriage isn't real until it's ordained by the Marion Popcorn Festival.

God willing, I’ll survive the car trip and attend the Marion Popcorn Festival this afternoon in the City of Kings.

A legendary Marionaire known as “Z-Games” once ranted about how he avoided the Popcorn Festival because he didn’t want to be pestered by former high school classmates to use his phone since theirs was out of minutes.

These were wise, wise words. There are 14 million things that can happen to me in Marion, and most of them are bad.

And yet… I’ve been walking around my husband’s house like a caged animal for the past 48 hours, telling her I’m getting into the “popcorn mentality” required to make the hajj to the fabled festival.

It started as a joke by Hilltop Husband that we weren’t married until we shared a popcorn ball at the Popcorn Festival. It’s been so many years since I’ve attended that I’m not even sure if there will be popcorn balls at the annual Popcorn Festival in the Popcorn Capital of the World.

There better be; otherwise, I might be in divorce court before the sun sets.

Please help me financially plan for that possibility by subscribing to The Rooster and supporting the largest independent media operation in the Ohio political system.

The Patriots Caucus has become the most feared bipartisan Statehouse cabal thanks to the brave and noble soldiers who have taken the financial plunge.

It’s a great time to join the ranks, as the political season will officially start heating up as we trundle toward November. You can also support the operation by buying one of our many classy shirts, tanktops or hats produced in the heart of Columbus:

The long con of Vivek Ramaswamy… in TikTok fashion!

For better or worse, we live in a vertical video these days. And as such, I have to keep up with the youth and make TikTok videos. You can follow me on Chairman Xi Jinping’s preferred social media platform over here.

For some reason, the Communist Party of China is suppressing my latest work, a 6.5-minute video explainer of that time the Patriots Caucus duped Vivek Ramaswamy into thinking he was speaking to the Ohio State football team—but not before we held an impromptu interview in a sweltering parking lot next to Raisin’ Canes.

Thankfully, on Twitter, the video has amassed roughly 150,000 views.

The big development here is using the green screen filter. That’s easy for the youth but required some research for me, the feeble 58-year-old man running this blog.

However, I was pleased with how this video turned out, and I hope to expand the use to create more video explainers about Ohio’s perverse political system. Stay tuned!

This week in Ohio Man…

Photo by Frederick Shaw on Unsplash

As this blog has proven, the First Amendment is a helluva drug. But even that has limits when posting actionable threats against police.

From Phil Hesel of nbcnews.com:

An Ohio man who was a member of the anti-government extremist “boogaloo” movement was sentenced to more than three years in prison Thursday for threatening to kill law enforcement officers, federal prosecutors said.

One of the threats Aron McKillips made online included a photo of him at his home pointing a rifle at a police officer parked down the street, the U.S. Attorney’s Office for the Northern District of Ohio said in a statement.

[…]

McKillips pleaded guilty on April 9 to one count each of interstate communication of threats and unlawful possession of a machine gun, according to court records.

He was sentenced Thursday to 41 months in prison, or three years and five months.

It's just a perfect summation of the Boogaloo Boy movement that their members are going to prison for posting threats online because they’re all socially stunted weirdos who fantasize about violence but can’t get off the couch to enact it.

Of course, it’s not heartwarming to think about how the fraud perpetuated on the American public by the Second Amendment makes it easy for these losers to obtain murder machines in the first place.

This week in The Rooster…

Photo by Buhai Alexandru Constantin on Unsplash

We had a truncated publishing schedule at Rooster Worldwide LLC this week thanks to solemnly observing the blessed holiday of Labor Day on Monday:

• The foreign money implosion. Republican legislative leaders had a meticulously crafted plan to hamper funding to the Redistricting Reform initiative. Then State Rep. Brian Stewart (R-Ashville) took matters into his own hands.

• Addiction only leads one way. Senate President Tim McVeigh Jr. (R-Lima) and his supporters in the Ohio House show the dangers of being addicted to ill-gotten power as they’ve been outworked by Speaker Jason Stephens almost every step of the way over the past two years.

THOSE WMDs. How to make six figures by reporting idling trucks… Climate change puts kimchi at risk… Everything you need to know about how cats sleep… The worst thing about this college football team is a win for most teams… Ski resorts are stockpiling snow to get through warm winters.