The circus never sleeps

The boys were back in town at One Capitol Square, including a former disgraced Ohio House Speaker. (No, not that one. The other one.)

Officially joining the DeWine Crime Family on Wednesday [photograph: The Traveling Mortician]

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Multiple Statehouse players asked me if Wednesday was like Christmas. It’s more like the pervert red carpet, I said. And I’d be lying if I said I didn’t love it.

Governor Mike DeWine was set to give the State of the State speech mere hours after Sam Randazzo, the corrupt former PUCO chairman appointed by DeWine, died by suicide.

It was a target-rich environment before and after the speech.

The biggest miss of the day was seeing Justice Pat DeWine slithering through the Statehouse rotunda without getting him on camera. Though, in my defense, it was hard to recognize him without a shining black eye.

In retrospect, I erred in not terminating my interview with State Rep. Ron Ferguson (R-Wintersville) to pursue Justice DeWine. You can probably surmise some of the questions I would have asked him from a dispatch I wrote about the scandalous Supreme Court back in November:

I skipped DeWine’s speech for two Bánh mì chicken sandwiches from Yoshi Asian Fusion across the street.

I saw one friendly Republican representative after the speech. He said he didn’t hear much about property tax reform, one of his key issues. “He talked about kids and the future a lot,” the Republican said.

“Well,” I said. “It’s not like ol’ Sleepy Tea wants to talk about the past right now.”

The Ohio Statehouse was fuller than usual on Wednesday with the biggest perverts in the state, including the author of this post!

When I asked one Democratic Representative for their take on the speech, they shrugged. “It’s another speech.” Perhaps a perfect summation of DeWine’s two terms as governor.

While I was stuffing my face with some of the catering, a friendly face approached me and said he’d take a picture if I wanted to get in line for a photograph with the governor.

DeWine and his wife, Fran, had been taking pictures with all comers. State Representatives Joshua Williams (R-Sylvania) and Jena Powell (R-“Arcanum”) were two people I remember seeing.

I didn’t think DeWine’s people would let me take a photograph. A few weeks back, DeWine had run like a bug when I asked about some of his corrupt machinations in the ongoing HB-6 scandal. I was also dressed in a tanktop dedicated to the missile summit of Donald Trump and North Korea's Supreme Leader Kim Jong Un.

The security chief asked me what I was doing in line. I said I’d like a picture with the governor. After conferring with colleagues, they made me put my backpack on the ground. The security chief asked me no fewer than four times to affirm that I would attempt no funny business with the governor. It was a trust exercise, he said.

When I walked up to DeWine and his wife, the governor asked if that was Kim Jong Un on my shirt. I said it was. DeWine agreed with my assessment that the missile summits were a good bit of American diplomacy. And then we took the picture.

Be sure to follow Columbus-based writer Craig Calcaterra on Twitter. And if you enjoy baseball and/or a smart guy’s takes on current events and pop culture, check out his newsletter Cup of Coffee.

Here are some tidbits and videos from Wednesday that I released on Twitter, where you can follow me for up-to-the-minute commentary on all of Ohio’s depravity:

• House Finance chairman Jay Edwards (R-Nelsonville) went out of his way to bash JobsOhio, which he says does nothing to help Appalachia. He also agreed with my position that JobsOhio is an easy vehicle for politicians to grant sinecures to their political supporters. One of the biggest questions right now is, “What is Jay Edwards’ next move?” after he will be termed out of the House later this year. I’ve heard he’s running for Secretary of State. But with a sizable war chest that’s sure to grow in the next two years, I think Edwards could be a wild card in the governor’s race.

• Attorney General Dave Yost seemed to enjoy the thought of taking down Lieutenant Governor Jon Husted, who hours earlier had been exposed by Jake Zuckerman of cleveland.com for taking $1 million in dark money campaign support from First Energy in the early days of what would become the largest bribery scheme in state history (that we know about).

• Husted, caked in makeup, got shuffled into the House Chamber by his security after refusing to comment on the death by suicide of Sam Randazzo. Neither he, nor the Governor, would give comment to legacy media outlets either. It’s curious (to say the least) that neither of them was willing to offer “What a tragedy” about a family losing a father and a husband.

• The House Higher Education Committee, knowing most Statehouse perverts would be occupied with the State of the State, met for 40 seconds before the speech to vote in favor of banning transgender students from using the proper restrooms from kindergarten to college. This is the kind of stuff that comes to mind when State Senate President Matt Huffman (R-Lima) and Speaker Jason Stephens (R-Kitts Hill) blame each other for the least productive legislation session since the Eisenhower Administration. The intraparty gridlock doesn’t seem to be an obstacle when it comes to shitting on transgender people, who, again, comprise less than one percent of the state’s population.

Also, shoutout to my new friend, The Traveling Mortician, whom you should follow on TikTok. What I love about chaotic Statehouse days is you’ll meet a guy called The Traveling Mortician, and he’ll reveal himself to be deeply versed in the intricacies of Butler County politics and politicos.

Friends in high places run roughshod over local blogger and friends in low places

Laura Bischoff of dispatch.com reported last week that former House Speaker Cliff Rosenberger (R-Wilmington) was set to unveil his official Statehouse portrait six years to the day after he resigned amid an FBI investigation into his lavish lifestyle.

I had honestly forgotten about it until yesterday afternoon when I received the following tip revealing the precise location of the Rosenberger unveiling:

For the unfamiliar, that’s an image of one of the many announcement video boards at the Statehouse. The portrait unveiling was listed alongside other public announcements like the State Senate session scheduled for April 24th.

I got to the Museum Gallery in the Statehouse basement around 4:55 because Snoop from The Wire taught me that if you’re going to do a hit, you better get there early. Also, the Statehouse closes at five and I knew I wouldn’t be allowed in past normal operating hours.

I strolled in and wasn’t sure that I was looking at Virginia “Ginni” Ragan, the longtime Republican House donor who played a major role in making Rosenberger the Speaker at age 33.

But she confirmed my suspicions when she spotted me and immediately went, seemingly, to cry to the Statehouse manager about my presence—after I had negotiated the boundaries of the “private event” with the manager.

Virginia Ragan (left) in my opinion, was crying to the Statehouse manager about my presence at a “private event.” You can read about her influence on House politics in this Cincinnati Enquirer profile from 2018.

Ragan then went to the office of the Capitol Square Review and Advisory Board (CSRAB, in Statehouse pervert parlance), apparently to request I be escorted from the building.