Rooster in Review: Your state on Republicanism
We're down to No. 30 in education, baby! Mississippi... you're officially on notice!
I’ve heard Democratic politicians of a certain age wish that the “old Republican party” would come back.
Not me. I’m 38 and came of age when George W. Bush, who now looks like Seneca compared to the Oval Office’s current occupant, ascended to power.
Bush melted the world economy and put two 20-year wars on the nation’s credit card (thus exploding the national debt by $5 trillion), all while cutting taxes for America’s wealthiest citizens. His Vice President, Dick Cheney, should be languishing away in federal prison instead of Wyoming’s most opulent hospital when the Grim Reaper eventually comes to harvest the few remaining shards of his soul.
The Democratic Party would be the conservative party in a functioning society. But that day won’t be happening anytime soon, as the billionaire class has funded a massive right-wing mediasphere that has convinced millions of Americans that standard-issue Democrats like Nancy Pelosi are Marxist.
Until something is done about that, our beloved backwater outpost of Ohio will continue to advertise the inevitable downwind effects of being ruled by a gerrymandered Republican junta.
From David DeWitt of The Ohio Capital Journal:
The Buckeye State slid two more spots in the report’s latest rankings of the 50 states, moving from No. 36 in the last report to No. 38 in the latest iteration.
In addition to ranking No. 38 overall, Ohio also ranks No. 41 in natural environment, No. 41 in higher education, No. 39 in economy, No. 34 in health care, No. 30 in crime and corrections, No. 30 in education overall, No. 30 in infrastructure, and No. 25 in fiscal stability.
On only one metric, opportunity, does Ohio crack the top half of states, at No. 17.
The U.S. News & World Report has been ranking the states since 2017, and Ohio has bounced around the bottom states in America that entire time.
In 2017, we were No. 35. In 2018, we dropped to No. 40. The year of 2019 saw us roaring back to No. 39. After no rankings in 2020, we came in at No. 36 in 2021 and climbed mightily to No. 34 by 2023 before dropping back down to No. 36 last year and now No. 38 this year.
Connor Dunwoodie of The Columbus Chronicle (more on him in a bit) recently asked me about what I saw as Ohio's biggest problem.
It’s a dual-headed hydra of wealth inequality and attacks on public education from kindergarten to universities. If you deny working people of an ability to critically think, they’re much more easily duped into thinking it’s immigrants robbing them than some asshole who owns a regional car dealership.
Ohio’s tax code perpetuates inequality, and the Speaker of the House, whom many knowledgeable citizens label a domestic terrorist, recently said the state can’t provide free school lunches due to the waste on green beans.
If you are a multimillionaire, I understand why you might support the Ohio Republican Party. It’s been good for your pockets.
But if you are poorer than a multimillionaire? It’s hard for me to understand your allegiance to the Republican Party, other than you put more value on making life harder for marginalized communities than you do on improving your own life.
A quick shout to The Columbus Chronicle!
If you are reading this dispatch and thinking to yourself, “Man, I wish I could get more of D.J.’s opinions in my life on this beautiful Friday afternoon!” Well, I hope you’re sitting down because I have some great news for you.
I recently biked to my old stomping grounds of The Bottoms to chat with Connor Dunwoodie of The Columbus Chronicle, a new podcast focused on Columbus and Central Ohio.
And I must say, it’s an honor to know that I’m now only one degree of separation from legendary local news anchor Jerry Revish, which means more to me than being one degree of separation from Donald Trump and Elon Musk (which is a fact, by the way).
Dunwoodie has some journalistic chops, and his podcast is a high-production affair. You can follow The Chronicle on Instagram as well as Spotify:
For better or worse, independent media is the future in a town like Columbus. And we’ll be in a better place with as many operations as possible in the area.
This week in Ohio Man…
Running from the law is not for the faint of heart.
Not only do you have to evade the panopticon of electronic surveillance and the most militarized police in the world, but you also must avoid the random good Samaritan who will put their lives on the line for little more than a shoutout from local media outlets.
From wsaz.com:
MEIGS COUNTY, Ohio (WSAZ) – A man who was wanted after a law enforcement chase is behind bars on Thursday, thanks to a delivery driver.
Deputies with the Meigs County Sheriff’s Office said Timothy Wickersham, 45, of Pomeroy, Ohio, crashed his vehicle in the area of Bunker Hill Road in Bedford Township following a chase and then ran into the woods.
Investigators said a delivery driver found Wickersham hitchhiking along state Route 143 and offered him a ride.
Deputies say that’s when the delivery driver locked Wickersham in the back of the truck before calling 911.
The article doesn’t clarify which delivery service employed that driver. But if it’s Amazon, there’s a good chance that driver will be fired for putting merchandise at risk and/or delaying their deliveries beyond an allotted time.
You might think I’m kidding… but I’m not.
Other Ohio Man headlines…
A 24-year-old Venezuelan man posed as a teenage homeless migrant and forged documents to enroll at an Ohio high school, officials say [CNN]
Ohio man sentenced in Lenawee County 1997 cold case of headless remains found in field. [Fox2Detroit]
Feds say local man had second-largest amount of child sexual abuse material in Ohio [WKBN]
This week in The Rooster…
It’s been another brisk week of business at Rooster Worldwide LLC…
Robbing gambling addicts to give to the rich. Statehouse Republicans look to expand iGaming in Ohio in order to further cut the income tax.
The pack mentality. Chinese immigrants potentially affected by House Bill 1 showed how organization and messaging can deliver wins early in the legislative process.
Bark with the creeeps. An exclusive interview with State Rep. Rodney Creech, about allegations he climbed into bed with his teenage daughter with an erect penis and only wearing underwear.
The heavy hitters behind the so-called Columbus Education PAC. What do Grange Insurance, Quantum Health, Corna Kokosing, the Columbus Blue Jackets, and Mount Carmel have in common? The answer might surprise you.
We’ll do it again next week at the same time and place.
Until then… stay frosty, my friends!
THOSE WMDs. The rise and fall of the Bombshell Bandit… Scientists found a massive copper deposit that could change the future of energy… The world of extreme-privacy consultants who, for the right fee, will make your personal information very hard to find… Three teens almost got away with murder until police found their Google searches… The airplane barf bag is an ingenious invention that most people don’t think about.