The Scarecrow goes to Washington

Facing an increasingly uncertain political future, multiple sources told The Rooster that Jon Husted is Ohio's next Senator.

Ohio Lieutenant Governor Jon Husted, who has an empty 20-ounce Diet Mt. Dew bottle where his brain is supposed to be, has a lifetime ambition of being elected governor of our polluted backwater outpost.

He’s been Speaker of the Ohio House, a member of the rancid retirement home that is the State Senate, Secretary of State and Lieutenant Governor.

Given that Husted made a backroom deal with Governor Mike DeWine to avoid a bloody and costly primary in 2018, Husted probably figured he’d be spending 2025 by seeding his gubernatorial campaign on the public’s dime.

But as it turns out, it’s almost impossible to forecast Ohio politics over eight years. Husted took that deal assuming that he would be the 800-pound gorilla in the 2026 gubernatorial primary. Nobody would have his name-ID, and if they did, they wouldn’t be able to go dollar for dollar with his war chest.

Husted and his sycophantic shoe-shiners never could have predicted that Trump would return to the Oval Office in 2025 and still play an outsized role in Ohio politics.

But that’s precisely what has happened.

To make matters worse, Husted hitched his wagon to DeWine, a guy whom the Republican base compared to Hitler because he listened to Dr. Amy Acton for three weeks during the initial outbreak of the novel coronavirus.

That trend continued with DeWine vetoing the so-called SAFE Act and also refusing to spew racist nonsense about Springfield’s community of legal Haitian immigrants.

That’s all without mentioning respectable challengers like Ohio Attorney General Dave Yost, who has all but officially declared for the gubernatorial race, and career conman Vivek Ramaswamy, who has at least refused to deny interest.

Despite all that, numerous sources told The Rooster after Donald Trump defeated Vice President Kamala Harris that Husted had no interest in DeWine appointing him to replace Vice President-Elect J.D. Vance in the United States Senate.

Former Ohio Republican chairwoman Jane Timken and State Treasurer Robert Sprague led the derby, with Congressman Mike Carey (R-German Village), State Senator Theresa Gavarone (R-Bowling Green) and former House Finance Chairman Jay Edwards (R-Nelsonville) also in the mix, but to a lesser degree.

Hell, even Secretary of State Frank LaRose laughably commissioned a poll touting his potential that his enemies in the governor’s office immediately leaked to The Rooster.

The mood around Husted changed a couple of weeks ago, in large part because Morgan Trau of news5cleveland.com reported on Dec. 20th that Husted and DeWine traveled to Mar-a-Lago to meet with Trump and Vance ahead of DeWine’s much-anticipated Senate selection.

Thank you, Jim Rennaci, sir!

Those rumors have intensified over the past two days, culminating in two of my most trusted sources independently stating that DeWine will appoint Husted to replace Vance.

Husted was in D.C. yesterday, ostensibly to attend an Ohio Republican Party fundraiser last night ahead of Senator-elect Bernie Moreno’s swearing-in ceremony on Friday.

However, Husted spent the day in D.C. “licking boots” in MAGA world, according to one federally connected Republican who spoke to The Rooster.

What caused the change of heart? It certainly didn’t help that DeWine lost the potential appointment to the Vatican, which would have allowed Husted to ascend to the governorship and forced the Ohio Republican Party to endorse and financially support his incumbent campaign in 2026.

According to two sources, internal polling showing that Husted would lose a Senate or gubernatorial primary without Trump’s support ultimately rattled him into taking the bird in hand with the Senate appointment rather than roll the dice for governor.

Husted’s staff, I’m told, went on the full-court press last night denying the Patriots Caucus report.

They are either about to learn a hard lesson about working for a narcissist or, more likely, simply going to the mat for their boss on the old maxim, “Deny until you die,” as their boss does some final politicking around who will replace him as Lieutenant Governor.

At last glance, Husted had $5 million in his statewide campaign chest. He can’t use any of that money for his Senate campaign, but he can easily refund those donors and direct them to donate to his federal war chest or allow his staffers to direct them to an affiliated c-4 group discreetly.

You can look toward Moreno’s Senate campaign if you want an idea of Husted’s career in Washington.

He will say or do whatever it takes to ingratiate himself into Trump’s orbit further because he knows that he could easily lose a Senate primary in 2026 without Trump’s Complete and Total Endorsement.

Like me, you might be disgusted by this development. But we can at least take pride in another Frank LaRose Senate campaign imploding spectacularly. Beyond that, we can also take solace in knowing that Husted’s legendary narcissism didn’t want to go to Washington in the first place.

He isn’t content being one of the most powerful federal politicians in America because, in his eyes, he’ll only be a single member in a 100-member body. He will begin his Senate career at the bottom of the totem pole, where other seasoned political operators will be able to keep him because his easy-to-see ambition outstrips his increasingly debilitating intellect.

Husted wanted to be governor because, finally, he would have been at the top of the mountain where he had seen himself for his entire adult life.

Usually, a United States Senatorship would be a helluva consolation prize for someone who didn’t spend an entire political career handing out favors to corporations.

Instead, he’s running scared from Yost and the specter of Ramaswamy—all because he knows he doesn’t have the juice to win without that Trump endorsement.

Those are hard times for Husted. And I can’t wait to remind him of his cowardice when we inevitably cross paths on Capitol Hill in the spring when he’ll be without his phalanx of gremlins because he’ll be just another unremarkable legislative backbencher.

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Governor Grandpa Sleepy Tea signs shitheel legislation while most Ohioans sleep

ICYMI: Last night, shortly before midnight, Governor Mike DeWine signed a bill allowing police departments to charge up to $750 to fulfill public records requests for body camera footage.

The bill was originally amended into unrelated legislation during the final early morning hours of last year’s Lame Duck Session to circumvent the normal public legislative process.

Even in the scope of Ohio politics, this is outrageous. Public records belong to the public. The public finances police departments. They finance the body cameras. They finance the public records departments inside police departments.

Police should want the kind of transparency that only body cameras can provide. But now, they’ll be able to bury as much scrutiny as possible behind a $750 bill.

Our leaders know it’s repulsive, too, which is why they chose to pass and sign this legislation in the dead of night. But this is Ohio, where somehow the governor’s alcoholic fail-son somehow isn’t even the most embarrassing member of the Supreme Court.

It gets to the point where you honestly start to believe that armed revolution is the only solution to our current plight.

THOSE WMDs. The day Treva Throneberry disappeared… Fatherhood, cancer, and what matters most… The Big One… We have fire everywhere… Bitter Pill: Why medical bills are killing us.